Tuesday, July 17, 2012

fraud detected (a mixtape by ham salad)


Some people think they're the best. The cream of the crop. The cock of the walk. Not me. I know when I stink. Some may call that loser talk. I call that 'being a real winner.' Inspired by people who play CDs (or compact discs, if you didn't know) at a middle school make out party and call themselves DJs, this piece-of-shit mix is dedicated to you. You're a fraud, and this mix reflects that. Oh, you want to know the twist to it all? I'm a fraud too. The mix starts off a little questionable with The Millionaires, but later eases you in with some familiar Classixx. GET IT??? PUN INTENDED! Definitely some dope tunes. While the crowd may be booing at first, you'll get the cheers at the end.

I've been sitting on this mix for about a month now. I was suppose to continue the Filthy World Warrior series, but work became such a mess. Then, because it had been such a long time since my last mix, I decided to slap something together really quick. Work became a turkey again and got up in my face. I finally had a moment's peace to release this guy. Rather than going for variety, I went with songs I really like, and songs I haven't used. Expect to hear some repeats, but eff it. They're great.


Millionaires - Stay The Night
Jupiter - One o Six (A.N.D.Y. Remix)
Classixx Feat. Jeppe - I'll Get you
Cool Million Feat. Leroy Burgess - Cool To Make A Million (Drop Out Orchestra Remix)
Ride The Universe - A Little Better (Feat. Jane Elizabeth Hanley)
New Order - Bizarre Love Triangle
Midnight Star - Midas Touch
Positive K - I Got A Man
Black Eyed Peas - Joints & Jam (Feat. Ingrid Dupree)
Kashif - Help Yourself To My Love
Cherub - All (Ft. Natalie Prass)

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

the filthy world warrior vol. 1: Japan feat. Saori Hara


I'd like to consider myself rather cosmopolitan. I find the merits in all countries, big or small, rich or poor. As such, it's only appropriate that I'd feel at home in any country I may find myself. More important than the countries themselves are the ladies living in them. Some travel the world, proving their might as the one true world warrior. Not me. I travel the world spreading love, yall. I strive to be the filthiest of the 'ilthiest. In this new series of mixtapes, I'll be traveling the world, showcasing some of the best disco and dance from all across the globe.

This week we stop in Japan. Playing some of the catchiest J-pop you'll ever hear, the mix cools down and serenades you with a groovy disco tune by Yamashita Tatsuro. Along the way, you'll find some familiar faces- Shook, Ride The Universe, and Kylie Minogue. Special guest intro and outro by soul sister and (not-so)secret freak, Saori Hara. Join me on this funky erotic journey through time and space, will you?


Penguin Prison- Multimillionaire (Shook Remix)
Perfume- One Room Disco
Kylie Minogue- Get Outta My Way
Sheila E- The Glamorous Life
Matt Van Schie- Be My Lady (Hemingway's Beach Bossa Mix)
Genki Rockets- Heavenly Star
Pitchben- Stand Up (Tiger & Woods Remix)
Ride The Universe- A Little Better (Feat. Jane Elizabeth Hanley)
Yamashita Tatsuro- Ride on Time

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

to trini kwan, thanks for everything. (a mixtape by ham salad)


When Mighty Morphing Power Rangers was the big thing back in the 90s, I was all about it. Karate fights with neighborhood kids, collecting toys, and endless debates on which power ranger was the raddest. Never the blue one though. No one liked him. Billy was a jerk. Now that I'm older, I look back and wonder why the everyone thought the pink ranger was so great. Girls who liked that show were always going on about the pink ranger. Eff that. Trini was the best. And while I may make rude jokes about your unfortunate demise, you'll always have a special place in my heart. This is why I've dedicated this mixtape to you. Thank you for inspiring little Asian girls to kick butt and wear a yellow wardrobe to match their skin color. If Thuy Trang were alive, I'm sure she would be dancing to this mixtape. Thuy, you so hot, girl. You make a brotha wanna sing.



The Magician- I Don't Know What to Do feat. Jeppe (Fabian Remix)
Jonas Rathsman- Tobago
Moon Boots- Off My Mind (Rogue Vogue Remix)
Jadoo Feat Hard Ton- Voodoo Love (Original Mix)
Erasure- Oh L'Amour
George Duke- Brazilian Love Affair (Zimmer Edit)
Chris Brown vs Eastside connection - You're So Yeah 3X (GonZo 70s Reboot)
DWTWN- Transition (Futurecop! Remix)

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

teach me, edward james olmos (a mixtape by ham salad)



Let's just get one thing straight. I hate The Dead Poet's Society. I absolutely hate it. On the other side of the coin, I love Stand and Deliver with a passion. As an enthusiast of literature, I feel short changed when it comes to inspirational high school films. Why do math buffs get to feel all warm and fuzzy running numbers while I, on the other hand, have to watch dickbutts stand on their desk and shout, "O captain, my captain?" They get the suave, debonair Edward James Olmos while I'm stuck with Robin "I'm a genie" Williams. This mixtape is devoted to Mr. Olmos and his number one student, Lou Diamond Philips. Remixes galore and the dancy beats that keep the party going are, as usual, present in this one. Take a listen!


Visitor- Los Feeling (Digitalfoxglove + Wonder Remix)
Taylor Swift- Love Story (Futurecop! & Ham$tar* Remix)
Michael Jackson - PYT (StardonE Remix)
Young Digerati- The Dauphin
Mix Chopin- Bliss
Vanguard- LeJeune
Perseus- Running Back To You
Gigamesh- Red Light feat. Amanda Love (Original Mix)
Poolside- Do You Believe (Goldroom Remix)
Tempogeist- Satisfy Me feat. Louise
Aubrey- Loma
Poolside- Harvest Moon

Saturday, January 21, 2012

miss teen disco 1988 feat. Kelly Hu (a mixtape by ham salad)


Some people don't care too much for beauty pageants. They think it's superficial and shallow. "These competitions don't judge the girls for their inner beauty and their personalities." Well, that just sounds like the ramblings of wet blanket, or a party pooper. I wouldn't call myself a fan, but I will say that I do enjoy the novelty of it all. It's almost like the Olympics for hot women, and if there's one thing in this world I absolutely love, it's the Olympics. This mixtape is a hybrid of new and old, here and there. There's quite a bit of 80s Euro Pop, as well as old school classics from New Edition and Janet Jackson. Remixes galore as well as a tasteful ending, courtesy of the Miss Philippines 2010 fan club.


Gold Fields - Treehouse (Gloves Remix)
The Whip - Divebomb (Futurecop! Remix)
Mylène Farmer - Sans Contrefaçon
LifeLike - So Electric (Original Mix)
Flight Facilities - Foreign Language (feat. Jess)
StardonE - Seti
Kris Menace and Savage - Let's Shower Together (Final DJs Edit)
Sabrina Salerno - All Of Me
Dragonette - Pick Up The Phone (Beaumont Remix)
Janet Jackson - When I Think Of You
New Edition - Cool It Now
Citizens! - True Romance (Gigamesh Remix)
Dye - Fantasy



PS I would have come out with something for the holidays, but with the new fightstick and all the new games, I really haven't been able to sit down and create. Not to mention, Whitney Cup 2k12 is steadily approaching and I have to hone my Tekken skills. New literary works coming soon (perhaps a quick screen play?) as well as a possible video promo for Whitney Cup. Collaboration still in the works, so hold tight.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Vegetarian Eats Pork




1996 June 15 – When one thinks of a vegetarian, they think, “What dedication! To not eat meat is quite the feat.” Others may have a more disapproving reaction, spurning their fellow human. Whether the reaction is admiration or disapproval, one vegetarian has decided to call it quits from the strict diet of fruits, vegetables, legumes and the like.

Stanley Chavira, vegetarian of over a decade, broke his lifestyle choice by eating pork at Dick Church’s Family Restaurant, an eatery in Costa Mesa, California. Other patrons of the restaurant watched in awe as the 23-year-old ordered a pulled pork sandwich. “It was as if time stopped,” said Robin Flats, a waitress at Dick Church’s. “I listened to the words come out of his mouth, and I couldn’t believe what I heard.”

After the order was placed, Chavira patiently waited for his sandwich. Snacking on bread and sipping on ice water, he sat in the booth with a calmed cool. Witnesses claim there was a wave of tension, so intense that all they could do was fix their attention on the man and his meal.

And then it came.

Some found the act of meat eating to be inspiring, using Stanley as a beacon of inspiration. “I think we all held our breaths when the waitress brought out his food,” commented Danny Thump, a fellow patron. “He’s an inspirational man. I’ve always been against riding in two seater convertables. Thanks to Stan, I’m brave enough now to give it a shot.”

It was said that Chavira took a modest bite and shrugged with nonchalance. When asked how his first taste of meat in over ten years was, he replied, “It was okay. Maybe I’ll do it again. But next time, I won’t let so many people know about it.” The pulled pork sandwich, which Chavira did not finish, nor take home, came with a side of French fries and a fruit cup. 

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

less polka, larry david. (a mixtape by ham salad)


Sometimes I wonder, "what would HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm be like if there wasn't any Polka music?" As fitting as it may be, perhaps Mr. David wouldn't be such an awkward, neurotic mess if he just listened to a bit of disco every now and then. In this mixtape, you will find a blend of old and new, from Madonna to Teenage Bad Girl, Hall and Oates to StardonE. Along with a happening playlist are the comedy stylings of Michael J. Fox, JB Smoove, and of course, the big "LD."


N.A.S.A.- Gifted (Blinn Remix)
Dominique Young Unique- War Talk
Madonna- Into the Groove
Mitch Murder- Alright (feat. Kristine)
Queen Of Hearts- Where Are You Now (StardonE Remix)
Ago- Trying Over
Cassette Club- Talk To Me
Deee-Lite- Groove Is In The Heart (Gigamesh Remix)
Hall and Oates- Out of Touch
Teenage Bad Girl- X Girl (feat. Rye Rye)
The Dream- Rockin' That Thang (Roy G and The Biv Remix)